I am an occasional collector of supermarket promotional stamps. If it’s pyrex or wine glasses, I’m in there collecting coupons like a nutter. But most of the time I can take them or leave them. Continue reading Did I tell you the one about my dressing gown?
Watching adults spell out words in conversations around children has always annoyed the shit out of me. We’ve all seen the films where someone spells some suggestive word and the kid immediately says “Dad, what does knockers mean?” or whatever. You also sound like an idiot s-p-e-l-l-i-ng out words in the middle of a sentence, especially when you do it more than o-n-c-e. But I’m just going to go right ahead and add it to the list of annoying things parents do. Continue reading Spelling everything like a M-U-P-P-E-T
Dear Disney brand manager,
I appreciate that you are probably one of about 10,000 brand managers who approves the use of Mickey Mouse’s head on gazillions of merchandise. I imagine that every single one of you has a desk that is probably overflowing with all manner of pieces of crap and you are driven demented with pencils, toothpaste, knickers, suitcases, lunchboxes ad nauseum. But seriously, that aside, one of you really dropped the ball this one. Continue reading Dear Disney brand manager, what were you thinking?
Breadstick, oh breadstick
Can I compare thee to a miracle worker?
Before, I only knew you as that restaurant condiment that made me bloated and drink too much wine before my food arrived Continue reading Ode to the humble breadstick